As I reflect on my year of novice motherhood I am starting to see a distinct change in my friendships.
It doesn’t matter what I do, sometimes some friendships just don’t last the change of season.
There comes a point when you can only extend an invite so many times, text, call, try to include them.
I have realized there are some people who we invited to our wedding, who I thought were great friends, who haven’t really seen my Max at all.
Then there are others who have become so special in this season and have made huge efforts to be a part of our everyday world.
The more I reflect though, the more I realize that family is an important part of my support structure, but not everyone has a great synergy with their family.
Monday night at family night, I lost it, for no particular reason, I’d just had enough. Then I realized my reaction was not helping anyone and an apology and quick getting over my offense was imperative.
Later in Jesus’ life scripture tells a few stories of how he could not help his family from their unbelief.
Often it’s those that are closest to us, who have known us our whole lives who don’t have the capacity to traverse our change of seasons.
The reoccurring problem I see in friendship conflict and family conflict is selfishness.
People who want everything on their terms and their way. People who are not able to see things from another’s perspective.
I’m not hurt that a lot of my friendships have changed in this season, just surprised.
I am sure as Mary gave birth to an illegitimate child, out of marriage her friendships changed.
The only thing that didn’t was the new family she was forging and in the future scripture says that Jesus had brothers and sisters.
I don’t have any real wisdom on this perspective today because in someways I am a little confused by it.
Family, it’s complex, but coming out of my week it’s imperative that we don’t fall fowl to old habits or reactions because we think more about our own offenses and hurts than others.
Friends, it’s interesting, no friendship will stay the same throughout the years. There are seasons where significant friendships change and wane. I believe the best friendships though, are those ones that both parties make an effort to encourage and support one another through different seasons.
I am starting to reflect now on my novice year of motherhood and make decisions about next year.
That’s why my post is a little transparent.
A toast to those who have supported and come alongside us in such an unusual season.
A toast to my family who are amazingly diverse and tenacious.
Merry nearly Christmas dear friend.
Family is full of flaws but truly are the making of Christmas memories.