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sleep o creative one, sleep

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Sleep is one of the most underrated health elixers in our society.

It is not until you have wrestled with insomnia or had a newborn in your house that you realise how important sleep can be to your productivity. The problem is sleep begets sleep and the other way round, the less sleep you have, the less you can sleep.

It is a crazy cycle.

One of my greatest struggles over the last three years in becoming a Mumma Bear, has been working out how to survive creatively on less sleep. I think my pregnancy weight has also stayed around longer, because of sleeplessness that bombards you with smalls in your world.

These are some of the little things I have been trying to do to help me sleep a little better, even when it is interrupted;

1) Put my ear plugs in and ignore anything that happens to my little people and let my husband get up. (smile not really.)

1) Seriously, remove my phone out of my bedroom. I have started charging my phone in our lounge room, rather than my bed side table. For many reasons, waking up to your phone and going to sleep with your phone, is a really bad habit for deep and restorative sleep.

2) Great Pyjama’s! I used to go to sleep in anything I could grab as I was tumbling into bed, old tshirts, falling apart gym/ yoga pants. I went through a wardrobe cull a few short months ago, and threw out anything that didn’t make me feel fabulous. Peter Alexander nighties are my current go to favourites. But intentionally putting on something that makes you feel inspired, comfortable and intentional is an important part of the winding down process.

3) I have been trying to read every night before I go to sleep. Reading really helps me relax and turn my worrisome mind towards more positive or interesting dialogues. Instead of the stupid status update that that random person in your world typed on facebook an hour ago. (smile)

4) No coffee after lunch. I am trying really hard, firstly to have only one, maybe two maximum coffee’s a day. And definitely not after lunch. Honestly caffeine doesn’t impact me that much, but I know the accumulative result in my body affects the overall quality of my sleep. A coffee doesn’t stop me from falling asleep, but it changes how well I sleep.

5) Having the hard conversations. Lately I have been really aware of the internal conversations that plague my sleeplessness or that make me restless. You know, that unresolved conflict. That worry, unspoken. That late night conversation with yourself that is never rational or helpful. I have been trying to stop pleasing people less and putting boundaries in my life to help me carry myself lighter. It is a battle I promise.

6) Being much more intentional about late night cravings, of chocolate or cheese or wine. Trying to work out where the hunger is coming from. Eating more intuitively rather than emotionally.

7) I have been trying to do some stretches before I go to sleep. Even just 10 minutes of stretching will increase your quality of sleep.

These are just a few of the small changes I have been making.

How about you?

How are you sleeping?

Is it affecting your productivity and relationships?

Let me know your tips.

Sleep well, o creative one. Sleep tight.

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friday faffing

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We went on our annual pilgrimage yesterday. We packed our lunch, the boys jumped on the train and the girls jumped in the car and we set our sights on meeting at the other end of the city.

We journeyed towards a place that needs a day set apart to visit and be overwhelmed by its storage and interior designing nick nacks.

Its the kind of store that you go in thinking that you will just get a couple of needed things, like photo frames and a new duvet for winter and you walk away with two trolley’s full of items you absolutely need.

Our destination was IKEA.

From photo frames, to new rugs, a whole new set of plates and gift tags, our car was brimming with bits and bobs to make our little abode much more organised and homey. A memory I will never forget, is the moment my little Maximus realised he has now turned three and is allowed to be  checked into little people’s land. He ran inside to discover all the new and wonderful toys and walked up to the glass wall and waved goodbye with ‘See you later Mummydaddy’ (he often joins our name together like we have only one name).

He was so excited and so were we until we had got half way through the maze, with a quick phone call saying ‘Mr and Mrs Viviers, Maximus has told us he is very sad, very sad indeed and wants his Mummydaddy to come back.’

Days full of firsts,

Beautiful moments I don’t want to ever forget.

So we made it through the maze with a seven month old, a three year old, a body builder and a writer all in one piece and we happily ate meatballs, chips, salmon and salad.

The adventure was complete.

Back to the train for the boys and the car for the girls. Team V, were sure there friday faffing was complete.

When we got home and opened the doors of our house already exhausted, we remembered with all things ikea purchasing the bits and bobs was just the beginning. Our friday faff had only just begun.

So screw drivers bounced and paper, plastic and culling began. Our little shack was given a post holiday makeover. Aunties and friends were called to come and collect little treasures we knew only they would love. Paintings were removed, plates were given away and new photo frames with gifts were hung.

Exhaustion reigned,

Take away thai was ordered.

A little drink was poured and the two heads of team v, sat and celebrated family life with two cherubs asleep and a house in absolute disarray.

I love friday faffing with my man.

Something I never want to grow tired of.

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me

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I’m the kind of girl who walks into a large setting, a big party, a massive event and wishes I could be anywhere else but there. Funny thing is, most of my life I have organised events, parties and big things. It’s like I get overwhelmed and don’t know who to talk to and what to say. The bigger the event, the more awkward you will find me. Until it is an event in it’s thousands, like tens of thousands. Then I float away in the midst of the crowd and love to be carried along.

We live at the beach, but for many years (like over a decade) I hated the beach. I have had to make peace with the beach and it took forever. One of my closest friends died at the beach when I was twenty one and it took years for me to recover. I have never been to the beach where he passed. Ever, and I’m pretty sure I never will.

I have a deep hunger for India, but I have never been there or know anyone there. I dream of travelling there and working, helping people to discover creativity and innovation. Help people discover their immense worth. Somedays from the minute I wake up, till the moment I close my eyes, I dream of distant far of places. This dream feels further away from becoming a reality than ever before in my life.

I love corn. One day after working hard in the slum of Thailand, I was completely overwhelmed from leading a team of creatives running a day camp for children, that I sat despondent just wanting to go home. Wanting to be as far away from that slum as possible. My husband (he was my boyfriend at that stage) went and bought me a corn on the cob and I started to cry. The corn made me feel like home. It made me remember Sunday roasts and corn fields of New Zealand. That one simple act of compassion, made me fall in love with him endlessly.

This is me. In less than five hundred short words.

I am awkward,

I am insecure,

I am brave,

I am colourful,

I am unique,

I am unsure,

I care way to deeply,

I am loyal to the core,

I hunger and dream of a generation who will rise up and advocate for the poor,

I sometimes cannot breathe because I am so invested in an idea and I have to give birth to it,

I am deeply spiritual,

I think way too much,

I hunger and thirst for righteousness,

I believe in love without borders, race, gender or religion,

I struggle with change, but also thrive in the midst of it,

I like to watch a television series, episode upon episode, day upon day, until it is finished,

I really suck at unresolved conflict,

I try desperately to please people,

I like to be alone but I love the company of a friend.

This is me.

In

five hundred

words

Who are you?

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fighting addiction

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My name is Amanda and I have an addictive personality.

The thought of having one coffee and then getting on with my day is foreign. If I like something I want more of it and quickly it becomes a crutch, a place of weakness, an addiction.

Last Easter, I fell in love with a little rabbit. Something so small, that every shop and every checkout seemed to be calling my name. This bunny taunted me. At the petrol station, at cafes, it was everywhere. You could be mistaken to think that this little childish dessert was innocent, but I found them to be evil.

The dessert that has plagued my lenten dreams was this little rabbit. Twenty two thousand people agree with me, that the Cadbury Cream Egg no longer reigns supreme as the Easter bunnies competitor, the malt laden bunny has taken over the race.

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Whether it be coffee, or a fresh loaf of bread from the oven or a Malteaser Bunny at this time of the year, I am trying my best to live a healthier everyday. One of my biggest goals this year is to loose my pregnancy weight.

Healthily.

Full stop.

I stood at the chemist last week and stared at the aisle of diet shakes, reading them intensely wanting to believe the promises they heralded. I wanted a quick fix, a get-the-ball rolling, helping hand. I walked the beach with my man today and we talked about this area of weakness in my life. We talked, we stretched, we exercised.

He reminded me of the pact I had made with myself, earlier this year. He reminded me of the promise. That I would make small changes. Good changes. I would find the areas of addiction in my world and say no to the bunny. I would not make these changes out of a place of negativity and lack, but to pursue health as a great lifestyle choice, that will never end.

I’m not dieting.

I’m not even going to say no to the bunny for good.

But I am facing the areas where emotional eating have become routine and making choices to choose wisely.

What areas of addiction are you facing?

Is it that late night dessert or the whole packet of biscuits?

Is it throwing up after a meal?

Is it a sneaky cigarette?

Is it one or two or maybe four glasses of wine every night?

I ask these questions, not because I want to intrude. I ask these questions, not to evoke shame.

I ask these questions because I struggle too. Being a mumma is hard. Being single is harder. Being alone is ugly sometimes. It is these days that we need community and friends to ask questions that healthily bring us back to a place of equilibrium.

A place of peace.

Best place to start is admitting it to yourself and the greatest, bravest step towards recovery is admitting it to someone else.

Be brave,

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the changing face of friendship

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There is always a time for everything. As one season drifts into another, I find myself reminiscing the old season but hungering for the new.

I love Summer, the long nights, the beach walks, the brilliant sunsets, the days spent in our swimwear hour upon hour. Although Summer makes me smile, I love winter as well. The crochet, the open fires, the slippers, hot water bottles, deep breaths in the morning that fill your lungs with freshness. Winter.

The darker months at my beach shack can be just as enchanting as the hotter ones. Some winters we spend more days at the beach than our January’s. The sun is less brutal, the wind is less fierce and winter is a little more forgiving here.

Personally, I don’t struggle to let go of physical seasons. I love Autumn, the colours. I adore Spring, its potential. Every season woo’s me with it’s beauty.

I do struggle to let go of seasons of friendship however. I grapple to know when the season asks me to dig deep and hold on. Then I wonder whether the time is asking me to give up gracefully. I have kind of always been a super-loyal person, who believes that everyone can be and should be friends over decades rather than years. I struggle to give up on people. I see the best. I ignore the unmet phone calls. I love deeply.

The older I am getting though, the more I am realising, that the best of companions on the journey, are the ones who embrace the season you find yourself in and not try to take you out of it. They take note of the season, they celebrate it and not try to remove you from it and sometimes people are just unable to go the distance, and that is okay.

The season I am currently in, is so different to my former one. If I continually tried to be the person I was a few seasons ago, I would not be able to plant myself and grow in the place I am currently in. I would miss the moments, I would escape the kisses in the early morning hours even though 4am cannot possibly ever be legal, I would let someone else raise my babes.

One of the best gifts we can give our friends, is acknowledgement of their season. Reminding them to keep moving forward and not get stuck in places, they were not designed to remain in.

This whole year, I have been saying over and over to myself. ‘New Days, New Ways.’ I want to be a friend who is aware of the new in my closest friends seasons and encourage it, embrace it, even applaud it.

Let’s not be the kind of friends that compete and compare, holding each other captive in a season that has past. Let’s move forward into the new and embrace the tone of the season. Personally and corporately, together.

One of my favourite poems is from the book of Ecclesiastes…

There is a time for everything,

and a season for every activity under the heavens:

a time to be born and a time to die,

a time to plant and a time to uproot,

a time to kill and a time to heal,

a time to tear down and a time to build,

a time to weep and a time to laugh,

a time to mourn and a time to dance,

a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,

a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,

a time to search and a time to give up,

a time to keep and a time to throw away,

a time to tear and a time to mend,

a time to be silent and a time to speak,

a time to love and a time to hate,

a time for war and a time for peace.

What is your current season?

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