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Place: My desk

Poison: chicken soup

Favourite Things: My sleeping boy

The word humility comes from the root Latin word hummus, which by definition means the kind of earth that grows good crops. I am on a pursuit of growth at the moment and every moment of growth is preceded by many moments of humility.

Humility is not quiet, humility is not withdrawn, humility in essence is a correct image and outworking of oneself, reflecting the image of one greater.

The problem with humility though is when we try to look for it in our own lives, it hides.

Tim Keller writes ‘Humility is so shy’. When we focus on it, it hides away it shy’s away from the spotlight and we end up thinking prideful thoughts.

Humility for me at the moment looks like the sixth washing basket finished as one more piles without me looking. Humility looks like a 3am feed, when I thought maybe he had gotten this sleeping through the night thing down. Humility looks like reading my friends instagrams and facebook status’ and continuing to thank the Lord for the day he has given me, not jealously lusting over anothers.

What does humility look like for you?

Can you differentiate between humility and a accurate self image?

I find the difference between these two really difficult. Humility is not telling myself again that I did a bad job, or that I am unworthy. Humility is reminding myself in joy, all that I have been rescued from and celebrating the giver of life.

A book I am stunned by at the moment is called 1000 gifts. It continually is challenging me to live fully right where I am.

I am a big dreamer, I am a big believer, I am a woman who loves to live large. However the season I find myself in right now is delightful and so heartening, yet sometimes boring, isolated and confused.

I am mostly confused about whether I will go back to work or not, I am mostly grieving a life of leisure where I could pop in and out of a shop, do five things at once and still know what was happening online.

This book implores us to forget our bucket lists, forget all those moments of fantasy and to enjoy, really love the moments we find ourselves in today.

She asks questions like…

What does a Christ-life really look like when your days are gritty, long and sometimes dark?

Do we find joy in the midst of deadlines, debt, drama and daily duties?

Humility is being content with ourselves, not looking for others to fulfil our sense of worth or value. Humility is loving the season you find yourself in but still having the capacity to dream for the new. Humility is servanthood personified. Not reminded everyone around us, how many washing bundles we have achieved, not reminding our spouse how many times we have swept the floor, humility allows our pride to shrink away and our humanity to surface.

Allowing God to keep us accountable to our sacredness, yet realising the utter depravity of our flesh.

The fine line between beauty and ugliness.

The fine line between sanity and otherworldliness.

Humility is the fine line.

Its ugly, its impressive, its silent, its loud.

Every time we think we have it nailed in our lives, it sneaks up and taps us on the shoulder and disappears again in a game of hide and go seek.

The pursuit of humility in ones life, is a noble one, a sacred pursuit, a holy profession.

I’m being humbled right now and it hurts quite a lot, how about you?


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