Most nights this summer, as I have seen a flash of pink hit the sky, we have run out to our little position on the stairs and watched the sun say goodbye to the day. Lately there have been many bush fires, so the sunsets have been somewhat bittersweet. The bush fire smoke throws a pretty amazing filter over what would already be a beautiful sunset over our Shoalwater Beach.
Every night as the sun slinks behind the sea though, there is this moment of nothing that lasts a good minute before the throw of colour hits the sky canvas. As I wait there for the colour to come, it is so easy to turn and walk away. The one minute seems so much longer than it actually is.
Many people take photos of the sun circle half dipping into the ocean and others of the purple and pink paint thrown across the sky, but no one really notices the space of the in-between. No one really notices because they are waiting for the flashes of colour to appear. They have a hope that the aftermath of the sun setting will be as beautiful as the time before. Moments of beauty mixed with moments of waiting.
This week I have had many conversations with people who are tired of the in-between. They so desperately want to move forward into the future and live the life they are dreaming of, but they are stuck in this place of in-between. Waiting for something we desire so deeply is a difficult season in anyones life.
A lot of the conversations I have had this week have been with people wanting to get married and they have been waiting for a long time. The in-between.
How do we carry ourselves in the in-between moments of life?
When we are applying for jobs and they just don’t pull of?
When we so desperately want to change our status from single to married?
When we want to start a family and the second little line just doesn’t want to appear?
It is a terribly vulnerable place to stand and look into the distance waiting for the colours of the picture you had of your life. It is just easier to believe that it is just not going to happen and to turn and walk away. It is easier to stop hoping than to stay stuck in a place when the deferral constantly makes your heart sick.
In my seasons of waiting, I have had some years when I have done it well and other times I just got sad, angry and completely over it.
The one thing I was determined to do though was to never give up in that in-between place. I never walked away. Even when my hope was so low, I still faced the mountain before me and believed that there was some way through.
Finding friends who would stand and pray with me. Chatting with counsellors and using writing as a therapy to process and let go of the disappointment and anger. Staying in that uncomfortable place of expectation no matter the years I waited. Reaffirming myself with promises and dreams that tarried.
Whether it is a job, a husband, a realisation of a career you’ve longed for, a change in circumstance, a family. I acknowledge the pain you are feeling in that in-between place. I am asking you to turn and face the horizon though and look for new and beautiful colours to return again.
Have you stopped believing your dream for better days could come true?
I pray healing over that in-between place and hope you can find rest, not growing weary.
Today if you are in an uncomfortable waiting place, my prayer is that endurance would fill your days and the answer you have been searching for in your in-between would come quickly.