Category: 366 days of novice motherhood

Place: home

Poison: Chenin Blanc

Favourite things: rainy Saturdays with my sewing machine

I went to the gym earlier today and I listened to a podcast all about conviction. A very old Indian man, who had planted over 2000 churches throughout India, stopped me on the treadmill and completely got my attention.

He really got me thinking about my own convictions.

conviction[ kuh?n-vik-shuh?n ]
noun
1. a fixed or firm belief.
2. the act of convicting.

He made me think…

What would I die for?

What are the convictions of my own life?

Even though I am not in a formal ministry role right now am I living a life of conviction?

Who can I help in my now?

What can I do to put steal in my convictions?

My mind was overwhelmed with questions that I was asking myself (internally of course, Otherwise other gym goers would have thought me mad!), so overwhelmed that I wanted to sit on the end of the treadmill and carefully listen.

In some ways I have used motherhood and this season to allow myself a get out of jail free card. I’ve used statements like ‘when max is older I will…’, ‘when I go back to work I will…’, ‘I’m too tired too…’, ‘I have a newborn to deal with…’, ‘Im stuck at home, I can’t possibly…’.

Conviction lived out does not allow excuses to stop its expression.

Conviction lived out is passionate no matter the circumstance.

Conviction lived out, laughs in the face of opposition.

Conviction is lived out.

I hold many convictions that have become a little pale over the last few months and I have allowed doubt to creep in because of a few circumstances.

No more.

The purpose and design for my life has never changed, it is just flavored a little differently at the moment.

Who says that my convictions can’t be displayed in the mothers and friends circles I now travel?

Who says that I can’t make a significant difference with my communication from behind a computer rather than a stage?

Who says that simple and small isn’t deeply effective?

I am picking up my convictions and living passionately to see life change.

Starting with me.

How about you?

What convicts you?

A

Place: home

Poison: an apple

Favourite things: the Internet and phone reconnected after the storms

Tonight we watched the DVD Toomelah which is a documentary type of film all about a community of indigenous Australians.

A couple of years ago I went out to an indigenous mission and I was so rocked that poverty so desperate was only a couple of hours flight away in our own country.

This film reminds me of what I saw in wiluna and reminded me once again that the plight of the vunerable is not only found overseas but in our back yards as well.

I think we can all get so passionate about making a difference overseas, yet there is so much need at our doorstep.

What difference can you make in your own neighborhood?

What do you have in your hand that could help another?

In my new season it is easy for me to see my level of participation in the greater good of human kind as really small, yet today as I talked with two single mums who were struggling, as I sat and prayed with a mum in her car, as we listened and encouraged some war torn missionaries, I realised we all have the potential to make a little difference. Which when combined makes a huge one.

Don’t think you can’t start something revolutionary. It may just start with a cup of tea and a listening ear. It may just start with your sewing machine or your crochet hook. It may just begin with your computer and a letter only you can write.

Decide to make a difference in someone’s life today. You never know what that little something could do in another’s life.

Inspired and challenged

A

Place: home

Poison: Pepsi max

Favourite things: spontaneous dates

Today my man and I talked over dinner about our thought lives and holding them captive.

We spoke about thoughts that had bombarded us both over this new season and ways we can combat the whispers that are not truth that try to hold us back.

Scripture says to take captive any thought that exalts itself over Christ in our lives.

I’m not sure about you, but I have thoughts that exalt themselves over Christ all the time. In fact all day long. I have to take them captive.

To take a thought captive means to contain it, hold it down, wrestle it, make it go into submission.

Lately I have been more susceptible to crazy thoughts because I am in a vunerable and completely new season. A season where I don’t know much, a season where I have no title to hide behind, a season of isolation and lots of time alone. In this season I have started to see patterns developing in my thought life that needs to be taken hostage of.

I don’t want to wake up when my new little man is in primary school thinking, I spent all those years consumed with myself. I want to be able to look back and say I did my very best and I grew as a person, I was the best version of me I could be.

An emancipated mum, has to equal an emancipated child. They pick up on our cues, they mimick our insecurities, they develop our disappointments. All because they mirror our reactions and responses. Children learn our behaviors.

Behavior always stems from our thought lives. No behavior manifests unless it has been incubated in our mind first.

So, I’m doing my best to capture thoughts that are not honorable, true, pure, good and life giving. I am doing my best to let go of the season that has past and step into the new.

How about you?

Hows your thought life?

A

Place: home

Poison: French earl grey tea

Favourite things: Kelly and Adam Cross over for dinner

Today was a strange sort of day. It started off with so much potential, after a great sleep I went to the gym and Max hung out with my dad, then we visited my Granma in hospital.

It had all the potential of a really great day…then I got home and realized the Internet was down, the phone lines were off and my mobile wasn’t working.

The storm that had been affecting so many people in our state had made its way to our house to frustrate and wreck our day.

I allowed technology and the lack there of to ruin my day.

It completely switched my mood, like a alcoholic needing a drink, like a drug addict needing a high, I needed my fix. I started to feel all panicky because I couldn’t get in touch with people. I felt isolated, I felt deprived, I felt seriously out of control.

I don’t know what happened to me, but somehow, somewhere in the process of becoming a mum, I have become addicted to technology.

I have been fasting television this month and it has been completely breaking me down, not having that connection to the outside world. I think our world is news addicted. We live off the drama that the media creates.

The storm in our city was escalated, exaggerated and dramatized by the media that whipped our city into a frenzy.

Here I was this afternoon a addict completely frustrated at not being able to connect.

What happened to my local coffee shop?

What about my family who live minutes away?

What about reading, writing, the old fashioned way?

When did I become so computer obsessed?

Tonight it was all brought into perspective with an amazing dinner with two courageous and beautiful people.

Our friends Adam and Kelly have just arrived back from a year and a half living in a slum in Thailand, serving the poorest of the poor.

Their stories made my heart leap, their courage made my soul quieter, their love for people made my thirst quench. I realized that technology although it helps us, it is our servant, not our master.

That servant actually needs to serve to help our purpose. It is not supposed to master us and our purpose.

So I am thinking more than television a social media fast is probably needed next, but I’m not sure how great I’ll go on that one.

It’s all a step at a time, but I am desperately trying to live a life of purpose drawing people closer to their creator.

That’s why I challenge and fast myself from things that cloud my mind and heart of pure and honorable things.

Technology you are an amazing tool, but I can live without you. It might hurt to start off with, but nothing should make me feel like I did today in is absence.

Even though my season has changed dramatically, I am not allowing technology to master me!

For today anyway.

A

.

Place: home

Poison: Pepsi max

Favourite things: my husband

All day our city has been watching and waiting for a severe storm to front.

It’s been the topic of twitter, Facebook, news, neighborhood conversations and emails.

We are all awaiting the sequel to a storm that has already maimed thousands of homes and left over twenty thousand homes without power.

I’ve been thinking about a sort of spiritual storm I have been weathering over the last few months and have taken comfort in this scripture…

Then they cried out to the Lord in their trouble, and he brought them out of their distress. He stilled the storm to a whisper; the waves of the sea were hushed. They were glad when it grew calm, and he guided them to their desired haven. Let them give thanks to the Lord for his unfailing love and his wonderful deeds for mankind. (Psalm 107:28-31 NIV)

When we walk through times of trouble, when we are in a personal storm, God is our refuge. God is our strength in times of trouble.

Sometimes I forget this and try to do it on my own. I try to stand in the middle of the storm without shelter. Which is ridiculous.

Just like the storm we have been preparing in our state for today, we need to prepare for personal storms and protect our hearts and lives.

Storms do come, personal turmoil does come. Times when we are rocked to our core, times when we are burdened by others, times of insecurity and fear.

Who do you run to?

Who is your shelter in a storm?

For me and my household we will serve the Lord.

A