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she contributes

 

knitting

she contributes two

 

Proverb 31: 19 She’s skilled in the crafts of home and hearth, diligent in homemaking.

If any book shows us the partnership in a household, it is the book of proverbs. A quick read of the verse above and you would think the writer is confining one party to the domestic duties in the home and the other to the real work in the marketplace. A much broader read and look, shows a woman who is savvy in all forms of business, who contributes significantly to her household and is deeply involved in all affairs including business and finance.

She is a maker.

She is a hard worker.

She contributes significantly to the overall wellbeing of her brood.

Before I became a Mum, I had so many lofty ideas of what it meant to be a ‘stay at home mum’. Before I had children, I would have clearly told you I would be going back to work after 6 months of being with my baby and had such strong opinions of what marriage partnership looked like.

Enter reality.

After six months of being home with my little boy, I knew I was not meant to go back to work and I needed to reform all those impressions of what marriage and motherhood looked like, reforming essentially the very core of my identity.

I realised that novice motherhood completely turned my worth and value ideals upside down and I had to reform my sense of self, outside of my career. These last few years have been the most revealing and the hardest days of my life.

Am I glad I faced these dark crevices of my soul though?

Absolutely.

I have come out of this novice season, realising that yes my worth is founded in so much more than what I do, but at the same time, I am deeply satisfied when I bring wisdom and contribution to places and people outside of my home.

I love to contribute.

I love to feel like I am part of a bigger story.

Every time I write, knit, sew, paint, teach, mentor, create, I feel deeply satisfied, because the journey of making something from not much is deeply ingrained in the way that we as women communicate.

We process as we make.

We focus as we create.

We connect our thoughts to our kinaesthetic touch when we create.

We contribute significantly.

Although I often look at this website hoping it could be so much more, I think about my photos, I grieve my grammar, I long for hours of quiet writing and moments of deep contemplation without a child scaling my thighs, I know a day will come when I will look back at these days and know they were transformative because I have surrendered to their anonymity.

Whether you are a working mum, who is doing her very best to provide for the needs of her household or a mum who is mostly at home, finding ways to contribute significantly beyond, it deeply changes our perspective and outlook.

You were born to contribute.

Your were designed to work hard and bring your best to inspire others.

Every time we see our purpose connected with another, we live a life that is deeply satisfying.

Are you feeling unsatisfied?

Maybe reviewing and refining the way you are contributing to others and your household, will realign your sense of perspective and help you see ways that you can live more engaged in your season.

Speak tomorrow,

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Day Six click here: She smiles at the future

 

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she finds focus

focus

Just this last Sunday, my husband and I were sitting in church and as I listened (intently, of course) he leaned over and whispered, “I think we have both become a little ADHD.”

I smiled, but I knew what he was referring too. We were both sitting listening to the sermon, flicking between instagram, facebook, smiling at a friend three rows away, checking the news on twitter and of course listening to the speaker (intently, of course). My husband is in the midst of launching a new not for profit business, on top of his full time job, I have my hands in a few big, juicy pies and we live distracted.

We want to work hard and live a life of contribution but at the same time we just don’t want to be those people who are a bit of everything, but masters of none. I know that women are supposed to be better multi-taskers but I am realising I can do a few things okay or I can truly focus and do one thing well.

Proverb 4: 25 Keep your eyes focused on what is right, and look straight ahead to what is good.

How focused do you feel at the moment?

What helps you to decide what you need to give your attention to?

“You can do two things at once, but you can’t focus effectively on two things at once.” Gary Keller

Wisdom calls us to focus on that which is in our hand and look intently at the opportunities in the future. To live a life of influence, it means we do stretch and we do give significantly and there are seasons of carrying responsibility intensely but there are times that we need to actively focus on the now.

We can spend all our time in our head in the future, we can spend all our energy on the past, but a woman of wisdom focusses on the days in front of her and peacefully leans into their potential.

If you are sitting at the dinner table with a  group of friends or family, put your phone away.

If you are in an auditorium listening to a speaker, lean in and put your distractions away.

If you are in a conversation with someone listen to them before you spend time planning on what your reply is.

Focus.

A woman of wisdom, learns to live focused.

Deep breath, this is the kind of person I want to become.

How about you?

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To read Day Three click here: She can do hard things

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wholeness, women and leadership

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If there is one thing I am passionate about it is young women who lead. I started my first business when I was fifteen years old and have always looked for people ahead of the journey than me to learn from.

I worried so often as a young leader whether I was good enough, whether I was too much, too loud, too disorganised. I struggled with my self image, I wanted to be liked by people. A journey of struggle, knowing I have always been out the front from a young age and destined to lead, but never knew if it was just too much passion, too many ideas and way too many opinions.

My friend Karina and I run a young women in leadership project with twenty girls under thirty. Leadership can be restricted to a set of rules, an understanding of what you are not allowed to do and a position that is given by someone in authority.

But what if our understanding of leadership in our modern society was so much more than this prescriptive approach.

What if women in leadership were not an anomoly?

What if girls were raised to believe they can lead and not be described as bossy?

What if we were okay with our femininity as leaders rather than pushing forward feminism?

I have seen women in leadership fall often into two quite clear categories.

1) ‘I’m here because someone forced me to be here.’

2) ‘I’m trying to prove myself, get out of my way.’

I believe we need to create a culture of wholeness surrounding women in leadership. Eliminating the need for people to feel like they have to prove themselves. Creating cultures where natural expressions of leadership no matter the gender is based in gifting, authenticity and grace.

A whole leader in my view is someone who is completely okay with their season and place. Someone who is not trying to prove themselves in a boys club. She is graced for the season she finds herself in, she is authentic and grounded in knowing who she is and who she is not.

She doesn’t spend her days trying to please everyone.

She speaks kindly and softly, bringing passion, colour and life to the conversations she happens upon.

She is strong yes, but she doesn’t have it all together.

She doesn’t compare herself to strangers on the internet or other women excelling in her field.

She doesn’t copy the ideas of those in her industry, she makes a way through her own intelligence and capacity and doesn’t make excuses for her unique insight and brilliance.

She is not afraid to say that she is beautiful.

Humility shrouds her words.

Creativity and grace is her gift to those closest.

Happy to say no and lift another up into an opportunity.

Excited to say yes, when she knows she has something to give.

Whole, healthy, strong, kind, perceptive, intuitive…

What an amazing picture of what women in leadership could truly possess.

Not competitive.

Bitchy.

Selfish.

Loud.

Hyperactive.

but grounded.

Whole.

Oh gosh this excites me for what future generations can walk into.

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