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the now

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Today marks the end of the second week of the Green Couture ‘in the flesh’ store being open. I also have a Green Couture on-line store – this went ‘live’ in January this year.

The on-line store was another of those steps that happen along the way to the dream being realised.

Who knows that starting your own venture requires investment?

Lots of your time, your effort, your money…

On the subject of finance, ‘The Wait’, catch up here (if you missed last week’s post), also resulted in finance being available to launch the Green Couture website, the on-line store & now the physical store… it’s all about the right timing! Don’t try to make things happen at the wrong time!

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It’s so easy to get distracted. I was having coffee with the lovely and wise Amanda Viviers earlier this year and she said something along the lines of ‘don’t compare what you’re doing with what other people are doing’.

Inspiration is great but not when you lose track of your own idea & start trying to recreate someone else’s dream, becoming a rip off of someone else, not the true version of you & what you’re meant to achieve.

If you’re building something stick to your vision; check regularly that you’re on track…

Don’t get sidelined by someone else’s dream…

Don’t be afraid to make adjustments, do something different or entirely can an idea, you can always go back to the drawing board if it doesn’t feel like the right fit.

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Being able to adjusting things as we go is very freeing. We don’t have to be slaves to what we’ve put in place, what we thought it might look like.

When something doesn’t work out how we might have envisaged we can

re-set…

re-think…

re-adjust…

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One of the things I enjoy about Green Couture is people. Relationships you’re your suppliers, clients & neighbouring businesses.

The myriad of different people you come into contact with who were all there doing their thing before you started your business but now your worlds have collided.

Opportunities!
to relate…
to be-friend…
to influence…
to be kind…

Life is rich!

Hope your Friday is going magnificently,

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Images – Krysta Guille Photography, Best in Park, Empirical Style & Ziporah
Dog accessories, wooden pendant lights & towels available at the Green Couture Store Online

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broken crayons

Amanda cover
The wheels have started to fall off our baby bubble and the hard parts have begun to set in.

Our two year old, who goes to sleep normally within a reasonable amount of time and sleeps a solid night, has decided whatever is happening everywhere else in the house but his bedroom is the party he has missed the invite to.

Our newborn who was sleeping 18 hrs a day and smiling softly as she slept has begun to wake up.

Sore bodies

Tired minds

More caffeine

Which equals more upset tummy’s.

Our week has rolled out with highs and lows, but we are determined to soak up the moments whilst my body builder is home from work and enjoy even the sleeplessness of a newborn.

Whoever said ‘Sleep like a baby?’ obviously never tried to fit a toddler, a newborn, a body builder and a creative into a 1970’s beachside shack.

I saw this quote this week and it made me smile. (In fact I giggled a little bit, it felt like a prophetic statement of my now.)

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As a child, whenever a crayon broke, I would throw it away with disgust, needing the perfection of the moment to create my latest design.

As an adult I have learnt that even broken crayons colour. In fact there are no perfect crayons sitting at any of my coffee tables or dinner tables, every adult I meet has a story that has defined them.

Is there a part of your life right now, that you are missing moments of beauty and creativity because your crayons are a little cracked?

Are you waiting for that perfect moment to start enjoying a season, without realising the colour and beauty is accessible if you just celebrate your now?

Our week has been a little broken.

broken crayon

Moments of cross words, sore knees, broken bodies, tired eye lids, long sips of coffee but honestly it has been filled with moments of beauty and divine inspiration.

Our two week old went for her first walk on the beach.

Our toddler discovered his shadow for the first time and said goodbye to it and then realised with absolute surprise that his shadow was following him.

The series here on Capture life has been really moving me, with inspiration from my friends all over Australia.

My body builder fixed a pair of curtains in our shack, that have been annoying us for over two years.

BROKEN

CRAYONS

As we start to acknowledge the colour and beauty, we start to forget that the utensils we are writing with are a little bent.

If you feel like all your colours are fading and your crayons are bending, just take some time to acknowledge the beauty and colour and suddenly it won’t matter anymore.

A scripture has been floating around my head this week;

Psalm 18: 19

He brought me out to a wide-open place.

He rescued me because he was pleased with me.

I realised this week, that the last few months of my pregnancy, I hadn’t gone outside very often and I had spent a lot of time inside. It was winter, I was exhausted with a two year old and my everyday tasks.

We walked the beach this week in the midst of very tired eyes and sore bodies, the winter sun beamed strongly on our shoulders, our toddler ran along the beach immersing himself in the moment, we held hands and our newborn swung softly in the carrier on my husbands chest.

It felt like a very wide open space.

The brokenness of the season felt as far away in that moment as the distant ocean we were soaking our senses in.

Somedays we need to simply walk ourselves into a wide open space and feel the release from the heaviness of the season, allowing the colour to rise in our hearts.

Broken crayons still colour my friend.

Speak next sunday

(Enjoy my friends each day between now and then.)

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No one likes a Bossy Pants

Brisita Rojas cover version2

no one likes a bossy pants!

She wrote it in my high school yearbook:

“You’re a great person, but a bit bossy sometimes.”

Bossy.

Not, great leader, good visionary, team player?

None, of that, but bossy.

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Being Latin American, I come from a long line of strong, determined, and sassy women. They are bold, passionate, feisty and all the while just a little bit cheeky. It’s not uncommon for the women in my family to loudly take charge without any fear whatsoever of people’s opinions about them.

It’s just what you do – get the job done, lead strongly, serve others, and laugh along the way – without considering your gender as some sort of restriction.

Why do women get called bossy when they’re leading the pack?

I’m not here to cry “sexism” at the top of my lungs hoping that my high operatic scream will smash some sort of glass ceiling. Hardly. Because to be honest with you I am a bossy pants sometimes – selfishly opinionated, demanding… all those things that we make us imperfect leaders and imperfect people.

While I don’t often hear this term being used for male leaders, that’s not really the point I’m trying to make – being called bossy isn’t cool and it’s not something I rejoice over. And yes, it sucks that women get this label where men get labels such as strong etc. But the label did make me stop, look at my leadership style, and refine it.

Ok, that’s not entirely true.

Before I maturely reflected upon it I shrunk away, avoided people, became a people pleaser and was constantly worried that if anyone got any whiff of leadership from me they would brand me bossy…

… But back to the part where I’m being sassy and strong (because that makes a far better story than the sad mess that was me crying over being called the B-word).

Here’s what I learnt:

There’s a very fine line between being bossy and being a leader. Leaders are in many ways, the boss. They lead the team, they provide the direction, they make the tough calls and they take responsibility. Nothing wrong with that.

“’Bossy’ is someone who bosses people around without reason.”

Stephanie Powers.

“Bossiness” has this connotation that implies one is more like that annoying six year old who demands that you pour the imaginary tea a certain way for the teddy bears and loses their cool when you spill air everywhere… it’s expecting things one way only and being foot-stomping angry when your team or even yourself doesn’t deliver.

It’s inflexible, domineering, patronising, selfish.

But, I meet far too many young women who are afraid to take on a leadership role for fear of the “bossy-pants” label. If you’re a leader, you’re a boss, and you as well as those that you lead may see your actions as “bossy”… but just refine your style. Don’t stop leading for fear of the label.

Perhaps the line between being bossy and being a leader is made up of the team of people that you lead, all standing in a straight line behind you, looking beyond you to the direction that you’re taking them.

Be passionate, be engaged, be ambitious, be strong, be the boss…

Keep your eye on that line and lead them well.

Speak next Wednesday
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Brisita was born in Santiago, Chile, before moving half way across the world to sunny Perth, Australia.

She loves hanging at the beach, collecting tea cups, and singing Whitney Houston songs in her car at the top of her lungs.

Brisita is a Youth Pastor at Riverview Church where she leads a team of youth leaders and volunteers as they create fresh and exciting programs for the next generation.

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‘Ish’

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A children’s story that can only be enjoyed by children is not a good children’s story in the slightest.
CS Lewis

I was recently given a book called Ish by Peter H. Reynolds.
It stirred my soul, and as I slowly flicked through coloured and hand lettered pages my throat got a lump and my eyes welled.
Ramon loved to draw.
But his work was criticized and he lost his spark, his confidence.
Nothing he drew seemed right.
Until his eyes were opened; his failed drawing of a vase looked vase-ish.

“Ramon felt light and energized.
Thinking ish-ly allowed
his ideas to flow freely.

He began to draw what he felt-
loose lines.
Quickly springing out.?Without worry.”

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Oh the lessons our creative souls could learn from this book!
We are reminded to create with abandon.
To enjoy our craft, without feeling the need to please.
We are reminded not to place so much emphasis on getting it right, or doing it perfect.
We can think ish-ly. And our reflections of the world around us will be just that: ours.
We’ll then have the freedom from fear, from people pleasing.
Freedom from that place where we are held back by the opinions of others.
I don’t know about you, but I totally relate to Amanda’s post here about struggling with self-doubt. As a writer I second-guess my voice, words, my purpose and my craft constantly. Because I think too much about what others expect, or may criticize!
Instead of resting in the knowledge that my work is Em-ish, and simply enjoying the act of writing, the experience of creativity, without concern or anxiety.

The second last paragraph of Ish describes Ramon savoring a wonderful feeling and deciding not to capture it.
Such a valuable lesson in our culture today, where life can be overshared.
We tag ourselves in wherever we go on Facebook, update our statuses for every meal we eat, and often miss the experience of being in the moment because we are too busy trying to capture it for Instagram.

Lets learn to savour, be truly grateful, without feeling the need to share, and miss those moments.

Ish is lovely, and poignant for the creative-at-heart.
And my kids love it too.

So, make yourself a cuppa, sit back, and my eldest, Joel, will read Ish for you.

xx

Em

 

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Living with a creative mind

Header Jeff and Julie

Why is creativity often linked to “madness” and why do creative people cause so much frustration to everyone around them?

Why do they keep going to extremes? Why can’t they just be like normal people?

Highly creative people have unique vulnerabilities and sensitivities – ways of thinking and temperament that need to be understood and managed – for them to not only stay creative and productive but also stay healthy.

“When I was a kid, I felt like I was this skin-covered antenna, and I could never get this antenna down. I was so aware of everything around me. I would watch people looking for signs of danger all the time. It was so acute that I really was able to jump into other people’s skins. From this vulnerability, came opportunity. When I was 13, I parlayed that passion into a means of escape.”??- Ryan Reynolds (US Actor)

The creative mind is wired with the ability to feel with great depth and passion.  Creative people often experience the world in a way we call skinless – as if they lack the protective shield and instinctive filtering that we normally use to cope with the barrage of sensory information that comes at us all.  Without good strategies for managing this hypersensitivity, instead of creativity – the result can be a plunge into the emotional depths.

“It’s as if neither of us, or especially myself, had any skin…I am afraid. I am not solid, but hollow. I feel behind my eyes a numb, paralyzed cavern, a pit of hell… a mimicking nothingness.”Sylvia Plath (US Poet)

The creative mind is also wired for rapid, fluid (divergent) thinking – making quick associations but also able to control the flight of ideas in a way that turns out to be amazing. When James Lipton (Inside The Actor’s Studio) interviewed actor Robyn Williams, his (William’s) rapid thinking – drawing on a well of memories – was able to improvise comedy in the moment.

JL: “Are you thinking faster than the rest of us? What the hell is going on?”

RW: … It’s all part of it, because I think the human mind is adapting and evolving; but I am trying not to speak all that fast cause eventually … you … have … to … catch … up. But the brain is not really working all that well because you know that you – cough, you breathe, you come back, she’s about to pass out (indicating a woman in the audience laughing uncontrollably) but the ideal is to create something different, something that moves with the times, new motion – crouching dragon – hidden CD (mimicking tai chi moves) move out away from the moment, take microwave – open the door…Along with skinlessness and rapid fluid thinking, creative people often have natural highs and lows, of mood and energy.

“It’s really important when it starts to come, it’s like you are in a trance and a frenzy all the time.” Rickie Lee Jones

Rather than trying to live a normal or balanced life creative people can learn to embrace the highs and lows – and begin to see their lives as being like the tides. The challenge for the creative is to learn how  to navigate the tides not struggle against them or get stuck.

“I dwell deeply in my lows. Not till recently have I tried to push through my depressing states I get myself in -­? but I feel like I am still a bit creative in my depressing lows. It’s more of a dry lonely state of creativity, but it’s definitely a dark time.”??- Case Study from Living with A Creative Mind (from an interview with the authors)

5 Principles For Living With A Creative Mind

1. Affirmation; Creative people need a lot of encouragement. As confident as they may seem, they are also full of doubt. Affirmation helps to buffer the skinlessness of the creative person. It needs to be at the forefront but it also needs to be real. No fake compliments please.

2. Permission To Fail; Unless you are willing to fail you will never be creative. Much of the creative process involves exploration, discovery and a willingness to “go where no one has gone before” – so although failure does not equal creativity – failure and learning from failure is a part of navigating the tidal creative life.

3. Fear Kills Creativity; Creating an environment of anxiety does not promote creativity. Fear automatically inhibits the fluid nature of creative thinking – to make us focus on a threat. While you might think fear is a great motivator, it only motivates certain kinds of responses. Originality is not one of them.

4. Room to Explore; Creative people need room to explore. An essential part of the creative (fluid) thinking process involves the search for new ways of seeing things, or new connections between old things. This often comes from what seems like ‘random’ activity like going out to new places, and seeking out new experiences. Don’t discourage curiosity.

5. They Need To Belong; Creative people need a community of like-minded types because they can often feel like they don’t belong. Creative people tend to be quite tribal…musicians like to work with other musicians, dancers with other dancers and so on. Find a tribe.

I am not like other people

other people are like other people.

they are all alike;

joining

grouping

huddling

they are both gleeful and content

and I am burning in hell.
my heart is a thousand years old.

I am not like other people.
American poet Charles Bukowski.

 

ContentImage-793-4980-IMG_7235Jeff and Julie Crabtree are the authors of Living with a Creative Mind, a survival guide for creative people and those who live and work with them. Their work is to help creative people be more productive without sacrificing their health, relationships and longevity.

They are also the directors of The Zebra Collective an online mentoring service that is designed for how creative people think and work. They produce short weekly bursts of highly digestible creative, psychological and management insight in visual form. They are also collecting and curating some of the most interesting behind the scenes stories from expert creative professionals worldwide.

www.zebracollective.com
www.livingwithacreativemind.com