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She trusts in something beyond herself

Andrew Fraser
Andrew Fraser
TIMBER CAFE, Harrisdale

If you asked me “What is the greatest lesson I am learning in this season”, I would answer with one word only.

Trust.

It is quite simple to be trusted by people, you show up, be loyal, say what you mean and mean what you say. Integrity, Honesty, Authenticity; these are all traits that build trust in others.

Trusting something that you cannot see, touch or feel though, that is next level.

Wisdom says this though;

Proverbs 3:5-6

Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do and he will show you which path to take.”

My immediate answer is how? what? who? and then I will slip another how? in there for good measure.

If you scaled me on the control freak scale, I could easily swing to the “I want to concrete plans down and drive slowly towards them” side. Lately however I have been seeking to walk more lightly and simply and my greatest lesson has been one of trust.

Wisdom is saying that sometimes we just don’t understand but we need to trust and seek.

How do you go in the trust stakes?

Do you always seek understanding rather than depending on another?

Are you so interested in control and safety that you don’t step out into the new, the scary or the sublime?

We often can be the greatest gate keepers to the realisation of our own futures. We stay captive in our own safe little worlds, like an elephant tied to a rope, that is fastened to nothing more than a wooden stake, because we have never known true freedom.

The greatest walk of freedom I have found personally, is the walk of trust into new and broader horizons.

I shake, I wobble but I step into places that only trust can lead me.

Are you questioning your purpose?

Are you stuck and needing to find release?

Do you struggle to even imagine what freedom could look like?

Then trusting something beyond yourself is the answer my friend.

It does not make sense, just as this scripture so aptly describes, but there is something so right in your soul when you contemplate it.

I am learning to stop thinking and to start leaping.

I am finding the more I loosen control, the more safe I am beginning to feel.

I am wanting to live a life that leaves a legacy for those following me and the best legacy I can leave is one of freedom and hope.

Proverbs over the last month have become our wisdom manual for living and I hope you have enjoyed the journey as much as I have personally writing them. However if a woman of wisdom only has knowlege and understanding but no trust, we will not live out the lessons that will lead us to new and brilliant places.

The very beginning of the book of Proverbs says this…

These are the wise sayings of Solomon, David’s son, Israel’s king—

Written down so we’ll know how to live well and right, to understand what life means and where it’s going;

A manual for living, for learning what’s right and just and fair;

To teach the inexperienced the ropes and give our young people a grasp on reality.

There’s something here also for seasoned men and women, still a thing or two for the experienced to learn—

Fresh wisdom to probe and penetrate, the rhymes and reasons of wise men and women.

Wisdom sneaks up and surprises us in all shapes and forms.

It is awaiting discovery,

It is calling us on its adventure,

It beckons us to live for more than ourselves.

Unless we trust in something beyond ourselves though, we can have all the insight and knowlege in the world but we will not find the missing key.

The part of us that was designed to take part in a divine, mesmerising story.

A story of hope.

A story of forgiveness.

A story about others.

A story of redemption.

A story so large that it encompasses us all.

A story that releases us into the reason why we are walking this planet.

A story, designed specifically for you to take part in.

We were created with purpose.

Wisdom plus trust plus hope thrusts us smack bang into the place where we were designed to thrive.

It is not an easy walk,

It is not a comfortable one,

but it is a life worth living.

One graced and etched in legacy.

Thanks for being a part of this journey, it has deeply moved me. How about you?

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she is honest

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERAA little lie here, a slight exaggeration there, it is as if something changes in our souls when we spend our days covering up the truth.

I have always struggled with exaggerating. Whether it is the creative in me, the performer, the people pleaser or just the lover of life. One thing that marriage has forced me to confront is this area of my life. Over the last few years I have been trying so hard to keep things real.

Real simple,

Real honest,

Real open.

It is like the days that I tell untruths, everything in my world dulls a little. Lies make me feel unsteady and I walk away from a conversation feeling cloudy.

How about you?

There is nothing worse than that sinking feeling when we are in a conversation and we are pretty sure that we are not getting the whole story.

That same feeling happens when we are not completely honest, it’s like we detach something from our true selves.

Every time we lie, we create a different version of ourselves and we feel like we are living in a foreign body.

Every time we are vulnerable and face the truth, when we are honest, when we say it just how it is (no matter the reception), it is like we reconnect with our true selves.

Are you living a life that is not congruent to your truest self?

Do you struggle to say things just as they are out of fear of rejection?

Proverbs 12: 19 would say this to us both;

Truth lasts; lies are here today, gone tomorrow.”

or this from Proverbs 21: 6

“Wealth created by a lying tongue is a vanishing mist and a deadly trap”

and this one from Proverbs 12:22

“The Lord detests lying lips, but he delights in those who tell the truth.”

The more we lie, the more we leave out details that bring the full picture, when we are silent when we should actually speak, when we speak things about someone that are just not true, we discolour the beauty of the opportunity in our present.

Every time we fess up, every time we say it just how it is, every time we softly say no that’s not right, it is like a light shines from within and the colourful beauty in the moment is released.

Wisdom knows that honesty as difficult as it can be sometimes stops a whole lot of pain down the road.

Wisdom asks that we speak less and when we do to always speak in truth.

A woman of wisdom lives an honest life, even when it hurts.

She knows that every time she hides behind a lie, she is not only hurting those around her, but is building walls between living a fully authentic life.

We cannot be vulnerable and strong, we cannot live authentically and purposeful, if we are always trying to remember what version of ourselves we have told someone.

A liar may succeed in the beginning but eventually their true colours shine, business associates become distant, family and friends never know if the conversation that they are having is complete and in the end they are not trusted.

May we all be okay with weakness, may we all be okay with failure, may we all create cultures around us that celebrate honesty and authenticity. If we do not do this, we will find that people around us will start to lie, because none of us can ever live up to the measures of perfection.

Every time we get honest, it will have consequences but will always set us free.

To read more: She has hope even when there is not much left to hope for

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She is more precious than jewels

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Shoalwater, WA

It is quite easy to look at the innocence of a young child and see their naive beauty. 

Their perspective, their lack of cynicism and the profound view they hold on the world around them.

Something shifts however, they grow into teenagers, then adults and we stop seeing people as humans and our expectations grow beyond the beauty and simplicity of the connection we once shared.

Yes maturity asks that we grow, learn and change.

And compassion asks that we treat people with respect and grace.

But sometimes we forget the gift of mercy that can be extended to all in times of stretch and strain.

The definition of mercy is this;

“To be kind or forgiveness shown towards someone whom it is within one’s power to punish or harm.”

A woman of wisdom bestows mercy often when it just does not make sense.

She does this because she recognises that she too is not without fault and someone also saw the innocent beauty of her humanity once.

It is a gift that continues to give long after the circumstance has faded.

Proverbs 11: 17 says it this way;

The merciful man does himself good, But the cruel man does himself harm.

When we are merciful and forgiving toward someone vulnerable, we see the person as a human being, rather than someone in whom it is our right to make ourselves superior. Mercy lets us set aside questions of equity, justice, vengeance, or even blame; it asks not what a person deserves, but what they need.

Understanding the brokenness of other people and the pressures they experience makes it easier to be merciful.

I love this proverb 3: 15 how it describes this wisdom and gaining a heart of understanding…

She is more precious than jewels, and nothing you desire can compare with her.

It shows the beauty that is available to everyone of us, outside of possessions, outside of looks, outside of jewels, gold and finery.

Without mercy, the world would be a harsh, exacting place. When we recognize the grace we have received, all of the times that we have, mercifully, not gotten what we deserved, perspective shifts and we find in ourselves a desire to give others the same gift.

Are you struggling to give mercy or forgiveness to someone?

Are your expectations so high, that no one will ever meet them?

Proverbs 17: 9 says this

Whoever covers an offence seeks love, but he who repeats a matter separates close friends.

Reframing your view of someone and seeing them as a child. See them as someone who so desperately needs a break. See them as human, broken, confused, impacted by other humans, someone who is just having a go. Yes someone that may have done the wrong thing, but never the less is seeking mercy.

You are more precious than jewels.

Wisdom decorates your heart and soul with indescribable beauty.

Every time we extend our hearts and lives to lift another, something deeply profound happens. An innocence awakens, a return to a place where we are not superior than another, we remember where we have come from, how many times we have got things so deeply wrong and an equilibrium shift occurs.

Let’s keep forgiving extending grace in situations that don’t necessarily deserve it.

Let’s keep finding ways to extend mercy and care to those who don’t thank us for it.

Let’s keep digging deep the well of wisdom, to find ways to bestow respect and honour on humanity once again.

We are not each others judges, we are fellow companions on the journey.

We were designed for community and every time we accept each others differences, we shift the balance back a little more to neutral.

Wisdom is not a call for the weak, it is a call for the very brave. Those who are willing to go to places than many do not have the courage to go.

Tomorrows post can be found here: She is honest

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she is patient in waiting

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Osprey Island, Shoalwater WA

You would think I would be a veteran at waiting after all the different seasons I have passed through but unfortunately not. I still struggle and wrestle in the wait.

I may be a little better in the way I try to control situations, but I am someone who waits quite badly. Escaping has always been one of my modes of coping and I am learning as I grow older, that standing and facing the situation is more important than the final outcome.

How do you go in the wait?

Do you tap your feet?

Do you cross your arms?

Are you frustrated at God?

A woman of wisdom is content in her today and hopeful for her tomorrow.

She does the in-between gracefully and relishes in the wait.

One of the most formational scriptures from the whole bible for me has been this poem from Ecclesiastes 3: 2-8

 For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven:

a time to be born, and a time to die;
a time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted;
a time to kill, and a time to heal;
a time to break down, and a time to build up;
a time to weep, and a time to laugh;
a time to mourn, and a time to dance;
a time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together;
a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;
a time to seek, and a time to lose;
a time to keep, and a time to cast away;
a time to tear, and a time to sew;
a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
a time to love, and a time to hate;
a time for war, and a time for peace.

I know in my heart of hearts, there is always a time and place for everything but the in between seasons of life often trip me up.

I read a quote recently that completely arrested me;

“Instead of waiting for your next holiday, why not set up a life that you are not trying to escape from” Seth Godin

This quote totally sums up the way I used to live my life. I would work hard, then run away. I would have a difficult conversation with someone then escape. I would drive a goal all the way home then fly away to recover. Lately I am learning to set up a life of inspiration and recovery, where I am satisfied in the wait. I am learning all about being in the present and not needing something in the future to drag me through. I don’t have this area all worked out, but I am learning to slow burn areas of my life that I feel supremely passionate about.

As I wait for dreams and goals to come to pass, I am learning to enjoy the stretch of the wait.

Proverbs 8: 34 says it this way

Joyful are those who listen to me, watching for me daily at my gates, waiting for me outside my home!

A woman of wisdom digs her well very deeply so that she waits joyfully in expectation.

I love how A.A Milne, the author of Winnie the Pooh puts it…

“Rivers know this: there is no hurry. We shall get there some day.”

Can you truly say you are okay in the in-between seasons of life?

This my friend is one of the calls wisdom, to slow ourselves, to be content and live the life that is before us, expectantly awaiting good things in the future.

Tomorrow’s post is here: She is more precious than jewels

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she builds her life on firm foundations

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Em Hazeldean, one of the lovely @secretsinthebay girls on a Rockingham Wild Three Island Tour.

Have you ever had a season when you felt like everything around you was crumbling?

I have.

That season was the most overwhelming time in my life. The funny thing is though, in the midst of the aftermath I realised that not everything had been taken away from me. What was left was my family, my faith and my closest friends. I found myself smiling, standing amongst this realisation, thinking I indeed was a very rich woman.

Just a few short months ago, my dear friends Aunty got the call that no one ever expects to get. She was called by her husband as he stood and watched their house burn to the ground. As my friend and her family searched through the wreckage of their home, they also had the most beautiful awakening moment. They realised although a million dollars worth of property and valuables had been lost, they still had these same things; Their family; everyone had survived the tragedy, they had their faith; which is now stronger than ever and they had the most beautiful sense of community as people gathered around them in their darkest moment.

At the end of the day, when all is lost, the only thing that remains is the foundation of what we have built our lives upon.

Would family, faith and friends be enough to sustain you if you lost everything?

What is of greatest value to you?

Your looks, personality, house, valuables?

What about your reputation, what others think of you or your online presence?

In the midst of tragedy or immense life change, none of these things will remain and when we build our lives around them, it is like building a mansion on top of shifting sands. The reason why builders require deep foundations of concrete, before any house is built, is because the weight of the life that is built can only withstand hardship and challenge, to the depth of its foundation. The higher the building, the deeper the foundations go.

If you thought of your life in terms of values, character or what is most important to you, how strong is your foundation?

If everything was taken away, what would you be left with?

A woman of wisdom builds her life around firm foundations. Values that are deeply ingrained in her character and life. Wherever she goes and whatever she does, she is congruent to the foundations that have been firmly dug in her life.

She values generosity.

She deeply appreciates and give precedence to her family.

She loves and pursues integrity.

These are the silent companions of wisdom that build strength in our lives.

Strength from a foundation that is firm, will always give us light and life to any path or season that comes our way.

Proverbs 4: 18

But the path of the righteous is like the light of dawn, which shines brighter and brighter until full day.

Proverbs 11: 20

The Lord delights in those with integrity.

If you find yourself in a season where you feel as though you have lost everything, have a look around and see what your life was built upon.

The values that we build our lives upon are the things that will hold us and keep us in times of stretch and struggle.

These foundations are very different for a woman of wisdom, than what popular culture would tell us is important.

What is the very substance of your life?

Who and what do you live for?

What do you believe you were created to do on this earth?

These my friend are the very things that will be important when days of challenge come. When we build our life on silent values birthed from wisdom, no matter what tragedy may befall us, nothing can dig up the foundations of strength that remain.

To keep reading here is tomorrows post: She is patient in waiting

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