Until three days ago, our routine was slick and I could get him to sleep in less than five minutes.
Then something changed.
His obsession with fire trucks maybe, his awareness of the world around him grew or a growth spurt…
Something changed, I know not what…and oh have we battled.
Last weekend in church the message was so great, it was all about living below our stress lines in life and what fills and drains us.
I walked into this week not feeling stressed at all and will walk out of it feeling like I am redlining.
Tonight after a two hour battle to get him to stay in bed I felt like a complete failure as a parent.
Yesterday I didn’t even want to write I was so deflated.
Then a few minutes ago, ready to give up my writing, (who can write when all you feel like doing is crying) I remembered my list.
What drains you?
What fills you?
Last Sunday after the message I wrote a list with my husband of what drains us and what fills us.
I started to recall those things on my list.
Flowers; a friend bought me flowers yesterday and my house has little pots of flowers all around.
Coffee and a magazine; Charl (my husband) bought me a magazine this week on his way home from work.
Time alone; charl is on nightshift and although it kinda sucks, I am in fact revelling in silence right now.
Writing; forcing myself right now and suddenly I am breathing deeper.
Worship music; check, tunes that bring life into my moments.
And my list went on.
My perspective of Mothers of toddlers has drastically changed.
Lord, grant me the serenity to accept the things I can’t change and to change that which I can.
Thanks for the reminder
Signing off, I have a movie to watch.