Category: the inbetween

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When you think you cannot dream again

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Brene Brown’s latest book Rising Strong has me reeling.

I knew it would overtake me when I committed to reading and blogging about it in the month of October for our new online book club, but honestly I had no idea that it would convict me like it has and I am only two chapters down.

How often do we let our dreams die and live frustrated because we have failed?

One of the most dangerous of kind is one who has realised that despite their failure, that they can begin to dream again.

Dream of possibilities,

Dream of what was seeded in hearts long ago,

Dream again of those deep utterances that they have not shared with a soul.

Dreamers.

Doers.

Believers.

The waiters.

The in-betweeners.

The frustrated.

The forgotten.

The disillusioned.

“All men dream, but not equally. Those who dream by night in the dusty recesses of their minds, wake in the day to find that it was vanity: but the dreamers of the day are dangerous men, for they may act on their dreams with open eyes, to make them possible. ” T. E. Lawrence

Have you forgotten how to dream?

I want to be a dreamer of the day.

Not the kind of dreaming, that finds us startled in the midst of our slumber but the sweaty, dusty, in the middle of the day dreaming of possibilities that have not yet been realised.

Have you stopped dreaming?

Has pain taken the wind way out of your sails and you are not sure you can have another go?

I totally get what that feels like.

Read this from Brene that I read today and I nearly fell off the couch…

“The opposite of recognising that we’re feeling something is denying our emotions. The opposite of being curious is disengaging. When we deny our stories and disengage from tough emotions, they don’t go away; instead, they own us, they define us. Our job is not to deny the story, but to defy the ending—to rise strong, recognise our story, and rumble with the truth until we get to a place where we think, Yes. This is what happened. This is my truth. And I will choose how this story ends.” Brené Brown, Rising Strong

I know in the midst of failure, broken relationship, dreams that have been derailed, it feels impossible to dream again, but I promise you that you can choose how this story ends.

Rise strong my dear friend,

Dream Again.

Come on the journey with us in October and buy the book or download it online, I cannot wait to see what has been stopping me from really stepping into arena’s that just keep on holding me down in my everyday.

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Praying those doors open.

beach, family, future

beach, family, future

Prayer is not really a popular topic these days, mostly because of the shame attached to people’s expectations of us. Something I find quite peculiar though is this, the one in Whom we are praying too, doesn’t ask for much more than a simple chat.

A lean of our heads.

A quietening of our minds.

A sneak peak into the unknown.

Prayer is all about communion, common union between the unseen and the seen, the known and the unknown and a humble stretch that says ” I do not know everything and need a little help.”

That is what prayer is, it is just a opening of ethereal doors into a new perspective.

Maybe that’s why it was created.

A space of trust.

A place of peace.

A realigning of purpose and perspective.

As I seek serenity in my days, one could think it is a settling down, a shrinking of a life lived sown, so that we can handle the task list, the people, the plans.

Lately I have been reminding myself that Serenity is allowing the Greater Plan, to become my plans. I have been reminded that my way is not the only way. I am learning to wait and see, that He is so good.

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Today I am seeking wisdom in my walk towards the next in my life.

Wisdom to know how to accept things from the past I cannot change, wisdom to know what I can change and the courage to actually do something about it.

I see people stay in places of in-between, like a holding pattern of unknown, because they are unwilling to do the little things that will take them to the next place of knowing.

When I pray, I find wisdom.

When I wait, I find serenity.

When I gain perspective, I can see what needs to change and what I need to let go.

Prayer is the vehicle that carries me to these places.

Lately though my prayers have been really simple. They have consisted of very basic words.

“Not my will be done, but yours.”

“Open Doors, open doors.”

I’m not struggling and striving hoping someone will notice, I am waiting, hoping, trusting and knowing that He brings all things together for good.

I know that He sees.

What is it that you are hoping for in this season?

What doors are you praying would open?

Serenity would tell us, have the courage to let go of what has passed, the tenacity to say yes when the new comes into our present and the wisdom to know the difference. I made this little poster for a friend today and it got me thinking.

It’s all in his hands.

The rest of this place brings serenity and peace.

Vickie 2

Speak tomorrow

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Stop comparing and run in your own lane.

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Shoalwater Bay, WA

One of the greatest inhibitors to finding my true voice, is the false, scared, intimidated voices within that continually compare my work to others.

My feed is not branded properly.

My writing is so grammatically poor.

My execution is a little corny.

People are going to think I’m promoting myself and think I’m all that.

Lately I have been sensing that my in-between is coming to a close and the new season my family has landed in, is uncharted waters. This song from United is thronging through my veins and we are absolutely walking into a space of unknown and my soul is crying out…

“Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders, let me walk along the waters, wherever you may lead me”

We are launching a new business in October, that is a massive step of faith for us as a family. It is a for profit business, that we will be giving away all the profits to programs for youth who are on the streets.

I have a manuscript that is sitting in the inbox of an editor right now and another on the desktop of a magazine editor.

We are talking about what is next for our amazing little group called Kinwomen and I have launched a series of gatherings for creatives called GATHER + GROW, that are selling out.

I am speaking tonight at a Creative Arts School about culture and lately I have been speaking at all different events at least once a week. Lastly but far from least we are one month away from launching Inspire 15 retreat for creative women at Bunker Bay next month.

I am telling you all these opportunities because my heart lately has been heaving. Not heavy, heaving (taking deep breathes) stepping out into uncharted territory. It would be so much safer and easier to get a real job and just settle. I look at other people’s journey and think, why don’t I just get a part time job and let someone else do all the envisioning.

The reason why I am not, is because there is something deep within me that is calling me to create things that no-one has ever created before. Ground that is breaking that will change culture.

Comparison is the greatest threat to the success and failure of all of these projects. Every time I compare myself to another, I stop running the race I was designed to live.

I am determined to bring the unique that I have to my family, community and culture. I want to live a life that charges forward into the unknown.

My prayers consist mostly of these four words at the moment “Open Doors, open doors”, not because I have an agenda of wanting to become this Instagram, superstar, author, Oprah-like mega person. I am seeking wider shores, because I know that there are people who are coming behind me that need me to forge forward into my purpose.

I am running madly in my own lane and every time I look to the left or the right, I start to stumble.

When I dig deep and lay it down. Not worrying whether anyone notices except those who are the closest to me and the ones who understand what is deeply etched in my purpose and life. I step into days of writing what our future as a family could look like.

I refuse to allow tall poppies to contain and bring me down to their size.

I refuse to do what has always been done, thinking it is the only way.

I am waiting, hoping, stretching and relying completely on God and the path he is leading me to.

It doesn’t matter if someone else is doing something a little like you.

Run your own race. Run looking ahead.

Run as to win.

Run without looking to the left or right.

Run.

Run with wisdom.

Run with hope.

Run with a tribe who shouts encouragement from the sidelines, calling out your best self in the process.

Share your hopes with people who speak your language.

Dream large.

Run hard.

Rest hard.

Live the life you were designed to live.

Stop comparing and start innovating.

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Stand Still, Wait and See what happens

Sayers, Leederville
Sayers, Leederville

Do you ever feel focused one minute and then second guess everything the next?

As a family we have all these projects on the go and if I sit and write down everything that is happening, I start to feel really overwhelmed. There is a funny wrestle going on.

I know we are stepping into great new days but just as that shift occurs, I am confused at what is important and what is just in my head.

The wrestle of faith, is the tightrope we walk between will and favour. We walk a fine line between making stuff happen and taking brave steps of courage and the wisdom of the wait.

Lately I have ben working really hard and as I sat this afternoon meditating on truth and hope, I felt hope arise in my heart.

This was the scripture that encouraged me today was this one from 1 Samuel

“Now then, stand still and see this great thing the LORD is about to do before your eyes!”

There are times of rest and there are times of wrestle, there are times of wait and there are times of courage. I think the balance is knowing what is your season and what your intuition is saying is right for you.

The world would say hustle, but maybe you’re just not ready yet.

The world would say promote yourself, but maybe all you need is a few of the right people and the gold is unearthed.

The way it rolls for some, is not necessarily how it rolls for the rest of us. The world would say use my formula to success, I would say what is your gut saying?

This week I booked a session on skype with an amazing Coach. I have spent so much time investing into others, that I was determined to find some wisdom in this season of stretch for my next steps. One of the greatest stories she told was about her journey towards getting published. It was completely different to mine. In fact, she was approached to write a book specifically. Where I sit with my manuscript in my hand thinking “oh my goodness, what do I even do with this?”

Every journey towards our purpose is completely different. We hear tips on how someone has grown their followers online, we read an article on how to make your blog audience more engaged or we hear a message on an overseas Aid organisation and we think that is how it must be done.

The how is actually what is right for you and your season.

When we rush ahead, anxiety reigns.

When we don’t allow the challenge to grow our character, we go round the round about again.

When conflict comes and it doesn’t get resolved we keep feeling the depth of that lesson.

What is your intuition (God, your heart, wisdom, friends, season) saying right now?

Be brave step out.

Be still wait and see what comes.

Get prepared for what is coming next.

Resolve those issues from the past.

Every one of our stories is unique and our journey towards living a fulfilled life is won and lost in our wrestle with the inner voices and how we read our seasons.

Find peace.

Work hard.

Enter the wrestle.

Let go.

Move forward.

Find strength.

Live beyond yourself.

Be generous.

and you never know the amazing places you will go.

I know the message that is current for me right now is this…

Stand Still

Wait

And See what is about to happen.

How about you?

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from little things big things grow

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The Grounds of Alexandria, Sydney

Lately I have had a little chorus growing in my heart.

“From little things, big things grow. From little things, big things grow.”

I have always known that this is a simple but profound principle, but when something comes alive to me I cannot stop singing it in my head.

The little thing you are doing on the side, your hobby, your passion, your idea, it has the potential to grow.

That lesson you are learning, that seems so laborious, is stretching and growing your capacity for the new.

Often our in-between seasons look a lot like the little.

We say goodbye to something that was, and we struggle to let go of the pull that draws us into its perceived beauty.

Last night I sat on the beach and watched the most amazing sunset, like a once in a year offering. On the beach beside me was an older lady, who looked like the beach was her only friend. We stood spellbound by the colours that flashed across the sky, in a moment that seemed too sacred to even speak.

So we didn’t.

We stood metres away from each other and awkwardly tried not to interrupt the quiet of the moment absorbed in the beauty of nature. A few photos later and I went up on the wooden stairs and sat for a long time just watching.

I watched the weight of years hang heavily on my beach combing companion. Her shoulders hunched hard and she walked slowly away from the point of the Bay. As she walked down in front of me, slowly, gingerly, I could tell she just didn’t want to go home. Every couple of feet, she turned back to look longingly at the sunset, checking its inspiration once again.

She walked painstakingly slow down the beach towards her car and the further away she got, the more she turned to see what she was missing out on.

Many, many turns later, she was mostly out of my sight and I saw her turn back just one more time.

A tear dripped slowly down my cheek as I watched someone live out literally how we often live our days.

Nostalgia is a liar, we turn and look back at the things we have done in previous seasons, looking longingly at what we have left behind.

No matter how far we have walked, we turn back, we can’t help ourselves with questions like;

If only? What if? How come? How could they? Why did it?

Then we step into transition seasons of the in-between and we struggle desperately to recalibrate because we are changing.

I think we are afraid of in-between seasons because there is something in our hearts that cries you were made for so much more than this. Then we look back and remember moments with the leanse of perspective and believe that it was just so much better than it actually was. Distance changes the colours and it looks so brilliant. As we walk towards the unknown, we can’t help but look back.

The unknown carries with it, seasons and times of starting again.

The in-between brings with it, pioneering times.

The transition between seasons asks that we begin again.

No matter how seasoned we are at transitioning there is something so awkward about starting at the foundations again.

This week though my friend this song has been haunting me…

Plant those seeds,

Dream those dreams,

Pioneer again,

Start that business,

Make that phone call,

Speak to that coach,

Ask someone for help,

I truly do believe that the best is yet to come.

I read this quote yesterday and it resounded with my season so much;

As you navigate through the rest of your life, be open to collaboration. Other people and other people’s ideas are often better than your own. Find a group of people who challenge and inspire you, spend a lot of time with them, and it will change your life.

Amy Poehler

You never know as you discover the new in your season, what life change is about to occur.

Yes that sunset looks absolutely breathtaking, but walk boldly into your new.

You just never know what may grow.

That little something, may just be what you specifically have been created for.

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I have been pretty blown away by the response of the Gather + Grow Sessions, they are selling out fast. Have a look at the link and come gather if you are local. I’d love to meet and collaborate with you.