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one life so many options.

Recently I was chatting with two women whom I respect deeply and one of them said this…

“Amanda I do believe in life you can have all the things that you want to achieve, but the thing that so many of us don’t realise is that they very rarely all come at the same time.”

Do you have a list of things that you want to achieve in this lifetime?

Do you often feel disappointed in the waiting place?

Have you given up on that dream that you have carried for a long time?

I am learning that we have one life, with so many options and the times that we lose significantly is when we believe we can have it all, at the same time. Even recently I found myself telling my friend “I believe you can have it all. I believe it my friend.” Then after I said it I tipped my head and thought, maybe we can’t have it all or maybe we can, but just not all at the same time.

Maybe not and that is okay.

Often I feel in these days of Novice Motherhood that I have let go of many unrealistic expectations of what I thought these days would be. I didn’t realise how much is sacrificed when we teach our children “no”. I didn’t realise how blissful it would be one minute and how out of control it would be the next. I didn’t realise some days I would kiss my babe’s with my nose and breathe in deeply their uniqueness and then others just want space, time and a moment to pee alone.

One lifetime, so many options. How do we choose? How do we stretch into those places of purpose but at the same time, live content in our today? This is the wrestle off my every day and every time I say yes to one of you, I say no to one of my family and it rips me apart. I am aching to live a life of contribution and reinvent what that life looks like but honestly, the wrestle is overwhelming and so deeply satisfying.

I think we sometimes act like we have no options and we are nestled in a corner with no next move. Now for some this may be their truth and it may be a hidden in the corner kind of season, but for most, I believe the options are limitless, I believe our potential is limitless and I believe the purpose for your life is limitless. The thing I am learning, however, is there are seasons of increase, there are seasons of decrease, there are seasons of stretch and there are seasons of letting go and every one of these seasons are full of options.

The problem is the way we approach it. Some of us shrink away and question every move and motive. Others of us hustle our way into the zone until we plant ourselves so firmly in that place that we are unable to let go and move forward.

Today I was thinking and scrolling, praying and seeking and I came across this beautiful prayer…

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It stopped me in my tracks. And I breathed deep and let go. Believing that the right things and the right people will come into my life in the right season. And my stanza of this prayer would say…”And when they do, to have the courage to step into the new together.”

What is your prayer today?

I would love to pray it with you and live inspired by your thoughts towards today and your future.

One life, so many options.

And often I believe God is saying to us, you choose.

Amanda

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I failed

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Recently I was walking with a friend and she shyly said.

“I don’t always read your blog because you make me feel so inferior because of how much you get done with two children”

Gahhhh.

That’s the complete opposite of the intention I want to promote here.

I always try to keep it very real.

I have been far from perfect this year.

I just keep having a go.

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This quote says it so eloquently.

Better than I could ever say.

I’ll let you in on a well known secret though, I fail all the time.

I set myself a challenge for this year and I failed at it.

I’ve started writing books that never made it past the first chapter.

I have tried to loose weight and diet more times than I can even count.

This blog is no where near as good in reality as the dream I have for it in my head is.

My books and blog are rifled with mistakes.

The thing is though, I just keep having a go.

Andrew Frazer did the street art up the top of this page in one of my favourite cafe strips, but who see’s the crack right through it? Did you? Go back and look.

I get up. I go again. I accept that His mercies are new every morning and I come up with a new idea and I do it.

I keep going.

We all fail,

We all feel insecure,

We all struggle,

But those who succeed in life, just keep going, one foot after another.

They have a go.

Speak soon.

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I Learned Love Always Leaves a Scar

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I went into “missions” with the sole philosophy that I would not let it be about me.

“I am only here to serve them” was my personal mantra, and it sounds like a good one, doesn’t it?

But my attempt to wage war on my own narcissism was one of the most narcissistic moves I could have made.

I thought I could take my suburban middle class self into situations I had only ever seen in documentaries and come out unchanged.

I thought I was the only one with something to offer to the people I was serving. I thought it would be wrong to expect them to have anything to offer me.

But that’s not how human encounters work. Human encounters, the kind that change lives, they leave both parties affected.

And that is how you know you have crossed the line from charity to love.

Love always leaves a scar.

There was a homeless man who used to sit across the road from my work. Each day I would give him money when I passed and he would smile at me.

I thought I was doing a good thing, and maybe I was, but it was only charity.

I never sat down and got to know him.

I never heard his story.

I never learned from his hard lived life, because I assumed he had nothing to offer me.

I deemed him only worthy of my charity, not worthy of my love, not worthy of a real human interaction, not worthy of a scar.

I don’t know if altruism is possible, I don’t know if we are ever capable of being truly selfless, I don’t know if we will ever know because God designed giving releases endorphins.

But here is what I learned on the mission field:

Charity always feels good, love always leaves a scar.

I learned it piggybacking my shoeless friend after she gave her shoes to a prostitute in a brothel.

I learned it sitting across from a refugee as she swore she would return to her war torn country one day and change the government.

I learned it when a teacher from Pakistan on the Taliban’s most wanted list had to help me when teaching English class.

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I learned it when we said no to buying a bracelet from Nigerian hawkers but came back later with lunch, invited them to an art exhibition and watched their whole demeanor change.

I learned it when I could not leave a country because a girl younger than me needed help for her and her three children.

I learned that the mission field is not about charity, it is about love.

And when you choose to love people, when you choose to be affected by their stories, when you choose to let their worlds permeate within your own, you realise how silly it is to think that you could leave unaffected.

Because love always leaves a scar.

Speak again next Saturday,

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Trust without borders

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One of my most memorable moments of the last six months, was when two blogs combined powers to help a woman in need in a small village half way across the globe.

During those few short days, the readers from this blog and people around the world were moved with compassion for a stranger. A young woman who we will never meet, is currently studying english, has a roof over her head and is taking steps towards life change.

Bethany Bracegirdle was the catalyst for this journey and I have asked her to write each Saturday about her recent experiences on the mission field and her clash of culture as she lands back in her home town for the summer.

Her series is called ‘Trust without borders; lessons I learnt on the mission field.’

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She is an amazing writer, with a malleable heart, a raw honesty and a big future.

I couldn’t be more excited to have her write here on Capture life, during the month of August.

One more writer to introduce tomorrow and then our series begins.

#captureaugust with any photos or inspiration you are having along our journey together.

Thanks so much to all the contributors, you are all inspiring me already.

With love

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