Category: She is wise

Posted on by — 2 Comments

she lets perspective shape her days

Western Australia
Western Australia
Swings with Libby and Max Fremantle, WA.

Today marked day sixteen in my household with no hot water. I woke up feeling a little despondent, but determined to count my blessings and soldier on in spite of the situation. The reason it has just taken so long, is a coordinated effort between three different contractors.

As I was walking on the treadmill though today, I was thinking about our shower/ power situation. Honestly I was having a little whinge to myself. No one else was in the gym, I was having my own little private pity party.

Mid internal whine, a young man walked past with his two sons. They walked around the corner and across the front pane of windows in front of me. As they moved past me with massive smiles on their faces, I felt my internal disposition switch.

You see there were two people walking and one little man in a wheelchair. They were both dressed identically in their hoodies and jeans, laughing and chatting, but one was pushed by his Father. I didn’t feel sorry for them, I was deeply moved with perspective.

I have a husband who is kind and caring.

I have a house that is safe and sound.

I have two healthy children who are my absolute delight.

I am extremely fortunate.

Sometimes it doesn’t take much for us to begin to count our blessings.

A woman of wisdom is shaped by a proverb like 15:15

Proverbs 15:15

For the despondent, every day brings trouble;
for the happy heart, life is a continual feast.

I was determined to live the rest of my day like it was a feast. A feast of lego, train tracks, little dollies and delight. We may not have the luxury of falling out of bed into a shower, but we have so much to be grateful for. We have food in our fridge, we have our health and opportunity.

We are blessed.

It’s funny, I see people sometimes writing “First world problem” on their status as a joke, but the reality is, most of what robs and steals our joys in the everyday are first world problems. I may not have had hot water in my little beach shack for a couple of weeks, but there are families just a short flight from me who have never had the blessing of running water full stop. Or maybe you might be having trouble selling our house, but there are people who have never known the safety of owning anything of worth. We may not like our job at the moment and feel completely frustrated by our boss, but there are people who have been out of work for years, desperate for food. We may not like our toddler climbing all over us longing for our attention, but there are little boys sitting in wheelchairs who will never climb unassisted.

This my friend is the power of perspective.

There is always someone who is wishing for what you are complaining about.

A woman of wisdom gains perspective.

In every season.

Click here for the next day in the series She is Wise: She is disruptive

signature

Posted on by — Leave a comment

she knows who is in her tribe

she is...

We have family, we have friends and then I think women of wisdom have their tribe.

The dictionary defines a tribe as this;

a social division in a traditional society consisting of families or communities linked by social, economic, religious, or blood ties, with a common culture and dialect, typically having a recognised leader.

Sometimes our friends and family form part of our tribe, but I have found in my life this is very rare.

The tribe I am referring to, is close companions who champion and celebrate your uniqueness, but speak the same language as you in the areas of your passions.

A woman of wisdom, has a tribe of women and men, who creatively challenge, who lead strongly together and who help one another contribute significantly to the community at large.

Proverb 13: 20 says

He who walks with the wise grows wise, but a companion of fools suffers harm.

A tribe of companions that help one another grow and live the life they were designed with purpose to live.

I have a group of women in my life, who are leaders, they are makers, they are thought provokers, they are questioners, they are believers, they are change makers. Every time I sit with them (just like the proverb 31 when it says about her husband “he is respected at the city gate, where he takes his seat among the elders of the land.”), we talk, we theorise, we change the world and we disagree.

A group of women who are in my everyday and some who are far away, but they are the kind of leaders that I aspire to be and they challenge me daily to keep growing.

Another proverb says this quite simply;

Proverb 27: 17

As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.

If you are not disagreeing with someone in your tribe, you are not growing. This is what a tribe does so well together. We sharpen, refine, stretch, challenge, grow and believe in one another extravagantly.

If you are a peacemaker, who is trying desperately to please people and not rock any proverbial boats, it is quite likely that you life may be stagnating and your tribe has become a club lead by committee rather than a tribe of change makers who are disrupting the status quo, to bring purpose and life to antiquated ecosystems.

I long to be a change maker.

I want to be a woman of wisdom who brings contribution to every part of society that I am engaged in.

I cannot do either of these things, nor do I want to do these things without my tribe of crazy, creative, soulful, entrepreneurs who take risks, who live life largely, who bring change for the vulnerable in our society and who live beyond themselves.

I have people who are my friends, they are precious, they are nurturing and an essential part of my life.

But a woman of wisdom also knows that in the world of dream making, being isolated in leadership, business and family is an unsafe place to be.

She creates a culture of community in her life, that is breathtaking.

She journey’s with people who understand her heart and intensity.

She loves extravagantly, forgives quickly and celebrates small victories with the women in her circle of trust.

She refuses to compare and compete with the women in her tribe because she knows that is so destructive to the very core of its institution.

Your creative tribe is awaiting discovery.

They are there waiting to be included.

What one person can do is brilliant, what a whole tribe can accomplish together is profound.

This is the call of a woman of wisdom.

A call to a life of intimacy, community and radical surrender.

To read my next post click here: She lets perspective shape her days

signature

Posted on by — 2 Comments

she shares her stuff

Flowers, Mums

Lately I have been struggling to share.

I spend my whole life telling my three year old to “sharrreeeeeee, Maximus” but personally, I am struggling.

Recently I was having a day where I had to take deep breathe more than once and I remembered a little story that had a huge impact on me at the time.

I was in a small town in the middle of Thailand and we were running a creative festival for the children in a village. Most of the children had lost their parents to AIDS and it was an opportunity where their Aunts and Uncles, come yearly to visit their nieces and nephews. A special afternoon, one that I have never forgotten.

A little boy whose name was “Got” stole a little piece of my heart that week when we spent time with the children preparing for the concert together. He had just seen his Uncle for the first time in two years and had been given the Thai Baht equivalent of one Australian dollar. He ran off into the little village, with his pocket money, so excited because he rarely got given anything that was just his own.

About fifteen minutes later, I saw him running down this dusty road back to the group of friends, that were sitting with me on the side of the road. In his gorgeous little hand he was holding the most expensive ice cream he could buy with his precious coins. As he slowed to walk back towards the group of his friends, you could see all the eyes of the children who didn’t get anything from their family drop a little.

As Got re-joined our circle, he had the biggest smile you had ever seen. The next thing that happened is as one of my all time favourite memories of my trips to Thailand. He walked from child to child and gave each of them a lick of his ice cream.

He wasn’t asked to share. He knew what it felt like to be the child who doesn’t get what he wanted and sharing was just a natural part of their culture. The little that he had, he knew that he needed to share it with all of the kids who were his gang.

Enter my current reality. We have a tiny apartment, filled with lots of amazing, creative personalities and as a novice mum there are just some moments that I want my own space.

Recently I was pretty overwhelmed when I won a brand new Ipad air on facebook. I was seriously so excited. When it arrived, I remember thinking straight away, “I am not sharing this with anyone.”

As soon as this thought hit my brain, I remember thinking about this story of my little friend “Got”

It was like his little face, his big smile and his kind heart bombarded my soul.

IMG_8049

Wisdom says that a generous heart will live a generous life.

Proverbs 11:25 The generous will prosper; those who refresh others will themselves be refreshed.

I know the way I want to raise my kids is with a generous heart and life. It is one of the core values I hold dearly, but children follow what we do, not what we say.

So lately every time my little man comes to me and asks to share my food, my desk as I work, my ipad as I scroll, my bed in the middle of the night, I am trying to remember the beautiful lesson that my little friend Got showed me, that when you share, even when you don’t have very much, your life is deeply enriched.

That my friend is a lot easier to say, than do.

To read my next post in this series click here: She knows who is in her tribe

signature

 

Posted on by — Leave a comment

she guards her heart above all else

Shoalwater Island
Shoalwater, Penguin Island

We went for a big walk today, to shake off the mornings cobwebs. Even though we walked far and wide, we knew our way home, as it was a path we have walked many times before.

The path a well worn part of our weekly routine as a family. Along the way is our favourite park, little sights and sounds we have grown to love, in fact we can talk the whole way and not ever get lost, the path leads us home.

 

One of my all time favourite proverbs is this one;

Proverb 4: 23 Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life.

Do you feel confused about the path you are walking in your life?

Are you unable to find the path that leads you home?

Instead of looking for directions towards your purpose or dreams, wisdom would ask you how is the state of your heart?

Another version of this proverb says that “our heart is the wellspring of life.”

It is like everything we do, everything that we are and everything that we long to be, flow up and out of the artisan spring of our heart.

If we are full of anger and bitterness, it flavours and impacts our direction and life.

If our heart is clouded by pride and arrogance, it shrouds the potential of the course of our days.

If we have not processed grief or strife it changes the tone of our days.

Sometimes the impact is not felt in the immediate season, but as we orientate ourselves towards the designs of our future, we start to venture off course.

Our heart and its condition impacts every single area of our life.

It affects the people we meet, the friends we make, the opportunities that come our way, something so small can filter the entirety of our being.

A woman of wisdom knows that the internal voice that leads and guides her needs to be retuned every so often.

A woman of leadership knows that she needs a group of safe and deep friendships that she can keep unpacking and processing the hardening of her heart.

A woman of strength is vulnerable enough to speak honestly about the condition of her internal world and ask for help when she needs it.

One of the greatest pursuits of my days, is to filter, process and work through that which is getting a little stuck in my internal worlds.

It reorientates me back to the path that sometimes feels overgrown and hidden, giving me a sense of direction towards the days I was designed to live.

I think finding the path again is as simple as getting quiet, meditating, reflecting, talking, processing, listening, thinking, finding, seeking the condition of our internal worlds, then slowly the course of our days becomes very clear.

The proverb goes on to list ways that our hearts easily become compromised;

Keep your mouth free of perversity; keep corrupt talk far from your lips. Let your eyes look straight ahead; fix your gaze directly before you. Give careful thought to the paths for your feet and be steadfast in all your ways.”

If your path seems unclear, today’s thought would be this, why don’t you dig a little deeper and look at the condition of your heart?

It may just reveal more than you expect.

To read the next day in the series click here: She shares her stuff

signature

Posted on by — 8 Comments

she knows the power of her words

tracey, beach, fun.
My friend Tracey on the beach, on Friday.

Today is day eleven since we have had hot water in our little beach shack. After replacing our whole hot water system, the plumber has worked out that we are not getting enough power off the grid and the power pole has blown a fuse. Enter the wait. Waiting for contractors, waiting for big company departments and waiting for body corporates to approve funds.

I have honestly been going okay, a plastic tub as a bath for my kids, using the kettle to fill up our sink for dishes and flannel baths for the adults in the family. We ventured out today to the city and went to church as a family. I was feeling quite good, except I knew my ponytail was hiding the fact my hair needed a good wash, but despite this was excited to see our friends.

Waiting in a queue, I saw a lady that I didn’t really know. She smiled and said to my little sitting in her pram “You have another baby now?” I said with a smile “Yes, it’s going really well.” She looked at my little girl and said “Gosh she is so cute, but you’re looking really old.”

I looked and waited for the laugh, thinking “Is she trying to crack a joke”.

No joke, she truly meant to tell me I looked like I had aged since having children.

I walked away and actually chuckled.

If only she knew that my husband was on nightshift last night and the 12am, 1am and 4am cries for help, were attended all on my lonesome in the middle of winter.

If only she knew that my husband didn’t go to sleep today, so that he could come to church with our little fledgling family.

If only she knew that I hadn’t had a proper shower in days and was putting on a brave face, venturing out in public.

If only she knew that two children in three years had made me a little weary, but I’ve been writing and contributing, doing everything I can to live a life of purpose in the midst of novice motherhood.

As I sit here writing, my little baby girl is grumpy because her sleep routine was upset today so we could go to church, I’m making my husband a coffee as he goes off to nightshift again and my little man is blissfully unaware playing with his toys.

The brilliant thing is, I was able to laugh this comment off, because I have built my life and sense of self on so much more than how I look. As I study the proverbs, I am becoming more aware of what is happening around me and the choice I have to be offended with the unthinking things people say so carelessly.

What does make me sad today, is the little I know about this lady, I do know that she is a Granma and I feel sad for the words and darts that have been spoken to children who don’t have the skills to dive and duck.

You see my Mum came over for a cup of tea this afternoon and as I stood up to walk over to put the kettle on she said this “Darling, you are looking fabulous in those jeans”, I just smiled and tucked that little truth in my back pocket.

Wisdom says over and over that we need to know the power of our words.

Proverbs 18:21

The tongue can bring death or life; those who love to talk will reap the consequences.

Proverbs 12:18

Some people make cutting remarks, but the words of the wise bring healing.

Two Granma’s spoke to me today, one bought life, the other albeit careless could have bought death to my sense of self and day.

A woman of wisdom knows the cost of her words and she spends them carefully.

May I be someone who encourages and truly sees every person and the unspoken stories in their worlds, rather than carelessly saying things that impact people tremendously.

Always encouraging every Mum I meet with young children, that she is doing a fabulous job, no matter how unshevelled, food covered or unshowered they might actually look.

Soldier on, dear Mumma’s.

If no-one has told you today how brilliant you truly are, then let me tell you this “Darling, those jeans look fabulous on you…”

Own it, girls.

Till tomorrow,

Here is my next post: She guards her heart

signature